It’s the eleventh leg of The Amazing Race and the four remaining teams are headed for Liverpool, England. The Howells start first at 10:30 a.m., and I’m still surprised that the elder Howell hasn’t pooped out yet. Brendon and Rachel start out running in the wrong direction, the Cousins are saddled with a knee brace, and My Family Is Famous bring up the rear with their blondness.

Once in England, Rachel says something about the other teams mooching off of their awesomeness, which is funny. All teams converge on Anfield Stadium. This excites the Cousins since they know how to play football, with or without a knee.  Teams must score two goals each. Leo’s knee is going to be a problem. The goalie’s skills are also going to be a problem.

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Gooooooaaaaaallll! The Cousins complete the task just as the other teams arrive. The clue sends them to Pontcysyllte Aqueduct. Brendon and Rachel finish next, leaving four people who have zero chance of scoring a goal on the field. Eventually the goalie guarding My Family Is Famous’s net goes to grab a spot of tea, giving them to score their goals. The Howells take advantage of the goalie’s bathroom break to score a few goals, and all teams are on the road to search for the aqueduct.

Roadblock! Teams must learn Welsh poetry in the fifteen minutes it takes to cross the aqueduct and perform it once they reach the other side. Somehow My Family Is Famous arrives first, with Brendon and Rachel on their tales. My Family Is Famous decides that Welsh is “the craziest language because they hiss at you when they talk to you.”

Brendon knocks it out of the park on his second attempt followed by Caroline. Jamal and Connor are stuck behind for more practice. Jamal finally gets it on his fifth attempt, and Connor right behind him with his fourth.

Detour! Boot It or Shoot It. Shoot It requires teams to shoot down clay pigeons, and Boot It is a water-filled boot toss. Brendon and Rachel arrive at Boot It first and are the first of many teams to reference Downton Abbey. My Family Is Famous choose Shoot It along with The Howells. The Cousins are lost, which is not a good thing to be on the last leg before the finale.

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My Family Is Famous kablammo sixteen clay pigeons first and receive a clue that sends them to the pit stop at Peckforton Castle. The Howells are second behind, so it’s a race for first place.

Meanwhile, ahahahahahahaha! Rachel misread the clue and caused them to complete the entire exhausting task with the wrong size boot. This sends them back to the beginning, with Rachel in a pile of boots and a pile of tears, just as the Cousins being shooting clay pigeons.

The Howells arrive at the pit stop as Team Number One, which is just incredible. My Family Is Famous checks in as Team Number Two. It’s a race for last place between Brendon and Rachel and the Cousins, though I suspect there’s some fancy editing for added tension. Rachel and Brendon check in as Team Number Three, which means the Cousins have been eliminated from the race.

Well, let’s see. Racing for a million dollars as an already rather wealthy father and son team, a couple of past-their-prime fame whoring country singers descended from extremely famous families, and two truly awful reality television “stars.” I guess that means I’m rooting for…Phil?

 Next week, the season finale in Las Vegas.

photos via CBS

 


Linda Sue Strong is the founder of entertainment blog TerribleTelevision.com and an occasional attorney. Her life has not yet been turned into a reality television show. Follow her at @themisslinda.

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